.august third. I'm still trying to figure out how to make myself fit in here. I'm not a product of the South. I'm not accustomed to heat and sunshine and palm trees. I'm feeling sad because I'm going to miss the change of the seasons this year. I'm not going to get to view the delicious transition that comes around the time of the Autumnal Equinox. I'm not going to feel that sweet cool breeze, hear those browning leaves crackle as they fall to the earth, or catch the scents of cinnamon, clove, or spiced apples in their proper setting. And I'm definitely not going to be able to wear any heavy wool sweaters this year. I guess I just don't feel yet like I belong here. I've found a job in a clothing store that I really like. I've begun to make friends, and I'm feeling somewhat comfortable with these friends, but I still feel insecure and alone. I feel myself clinging to Matthew because he's all that I know, and that's not fair for him or myself. I'm envious of him because he's got this wonderful thing about him that draws people in so easily; everyone likes him, it seems, and he has to put no effort into his relationships with others. And then there's me. The girl who has somehow made this entry into a self-pity rant. The shadow who needs to pull away from her own introversion, and make a gesture of interest into this new home called Orlando.