.may. In the night I cry. I smudge my pillow with tears. I deserve this. I've hurt so much. Don't you dare call me beautiful. I want to be ugly and vile and slither in the earth like a worm eaten corpse. I deserve your stares and unintelligable murmers. I deserve this hundred years of filth that i am about to recieve. I'm glad to be the outcast. I am dirty and cursed and disgusting but deep down I want to be beautiful and stop living this lonely lie. Deep down i want to drag you down with me and molest you. I want to make you relive my horror. I want to envelop you in my shame. You have no idea what you've done to me. You've scarred me for life, you horrible bastard, you and your brother, yeah your brother who was just as filthy and immoral as you are. You've scarred me. I'll never be normal now. I can never be normal; I can never touch. I can never be like everyone else. I can never be normal. I wonder now do you remember what you did? Can you think of the horror, the life you've ruined. I hope you do: I hope you think on it as often as I do. I hope your cursed. I hope you live in shame. I hope you are an outcast, but I wish you were dead. Yeah, I wish you were dead.